Whines**
When are you coming back???~~
DDDx
Monday, December 26, 2011
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Today is Christmas
Christmas is today.
I wasn't expecting much anyway...
I didn't know the days to Christmas till last last night... /:
God, for Christmas, I want the world to live in peace and harmony.
Jesus, for Christmas, will you be born again and live with us eternally?
If its possible, Santa, all I want for Christmas is him talking to me again.
I wish we could sit together near the fireplace and roast marshmallows under the mistletoe.
I wish we could sit together and watch mushy mushy movies XD
I wish I could cuddle up to you on the couch and recall back together the times we spent throughout the year.
I wish you would come back from India, your so far away...
I wish you would talk to me again..
I wish you could be my friend again...
I miss you... /:
Badly, to be precise.
Very badly...
Well... At least you know..
Maybe you didn't anyway..
Sigh. Boys.
I hate knowing facts..
It screws up my thinking... /:
I wasn't expecting much anyway...
I didn't know the days to Christmas till last last night... /:
God, for Christmas, I want the world to live in peace and harmony.
Jesus, for Christmas, will you be born again and live with us eternally?
If its possible, Santa, all I want for Christmas is him talking to me again.
I wish we could sit together near the fireplace and roast marshmallows under the mistletoe.
I wish we could sit together and watch mushy mushy movies XD
I wish I could cuddle up to you on the couch and recall back together the times we spent throughout the year.
I wish you would come back from India, your so far away...
I wish you would talk to me again..
I wish you could be my friend again...
I miss you... /:
Badly, to be precise.
Very badly...
Well... At least you know..
Maybe you didn't anyway..
Sigh. Boys.
I hate knowing facts..
It screws up my thinking... /:
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Humble
Papa...
Why can't you have a humble heart papa?
Papa, God's words are not crap papa.. Mama is not filling my mind with crap, papa.
God, forgive my papa for saying your Words are crap...
Papa, in order for people to serve you well, we must serve other people well..
Why can't you understand it papa?
Money is not everything papa...
What if anything happens to your money?
Money doesn't last papa, we earn money when we can.
Papa, you don't like it, cause you are not used to serving people papa.
Papa, please don't scold...
Why can't you have a humble heart papa?
Papa, God's words are not crap papa.. Mama is not filling my mind with crap, papa.
God, forgive my papa for saying your Words are crap...
Papa, in order for people to serve you well, we must serve other people well..
Why can't you understand it papa?
Money is not everything papa...
What if anything happens to your money?
Money doesn't last papa, we earn money when we can.
Papa, you don't like it, cause you are not used to serving people papa.
Papa, please don't scold...
Sunday, December 04, 2011
SAT
He had an exam that Saturday..
I really really wanted to wish him good luck... I really do..
He wouldn't like it anyway...
Better not say anything or else my wishes turn to bad...
He might not concentrate well after that... Better keep my mouth shut for a while...
But I'm praying that he'll do well though, and praying good results for him :)))))
I'll wait till after the results, and I'll wish him congrats. :))
I really really wanted to wish him good luck... I really do..
He wouldn't like it anyway...
Better not say anything or else my wishes turn to bad...
He might not concentrate well after that... Better keep my mouth shut for a while...
But I'm praying that he'll do well though, and praying good results for him :)))))
I'll wait till after the results, and I'll wish him congrats. :))
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Helpful
At least in some part of the world, I know of a friend who helps you things even in the middle of the night when he's supposed to be studying hard to be a great doctor.
At least it's better than him.
He ignored it.
Maybe.
Or he didn't read it yet.
Or he pretended it wasn't there, closed his eyes, and deleted it.
Unhelpful person =3=
At least in some part of the world, someone would be willing to change themselves in order to change the world a better place.
God, why didn't you give us skin-blind eyes??
God, why do they always have to insult them when they know I didn't like it??
God, why do they pretend??
God, it isn't their fault, why do they have to be insulted for what they are??
God, please take away the evil and hateful words of racist out from their mouth, dear Lord.
God, please don't let my brother be like them Lord.
God, please give my father a more caring and kind heart.
God, please give my mother a mouth of grace and mercy.
God, please give my brother a heart of obedience and goodness.
God, please lend me your strength to prevent their hateful words from spilling out.
Shoot.. I'm going off topic.
XD
If the world has more people like this, the world would be a better place to be.
Thank you!!! :)))))
You know who you are :P
With appreciation,
Little Missy (;
At least it's better than him.
He ignored it.
Maybe.
Or he didn't read it yet.
Or he pretended it wasn't there, closed his eyes, and deleted it.
Unhelpful person =3=
At least in some part of the world, someone would be willing to change themselves in order to change the world a better place.
God, why didn't you give us skin-blind eyes??
God, why do they always have to insult them when they know I didn't like it??
God, why do they pretend??
God, it isn't their fault, why do they have to be insulted for what they are??
God, please take away the evil and hateful words of racist out from their mouth, dear Lord.
God, please don't let my brother be like them Lord.
God, please give my father a more caring and kind heart.
God, please give my mother a mouth of grace and mercy.
God, please give my brother a heart of obedience and goodness.
God, please lend me your strength to prevent their hateful words from spilling out.
Shoot.. I'm going off topic.
XD
If the world has more people like this, the world would be a better place to be.
Thank you!!! :)))))
You know who you are :P
With appreciation,
Little Missy (;
Only a dream???DDDX
It's just a dream...
It was a good dream..
A dream that probably will never come true..
He wouldn't do that..
I couldn't do that either..
The place never existed..
Neither is the era..
Unless it is happening now in the repeating past somewhere in the world.
No one was there just the two of us.
He gave me a piece of paper.
My eyes could only be filled with tears of happiness as I read it again and again, to make sure it's not a dream.
I was crying with tears of happiness when suddenly a riiinnngg pierce through my ears..
I awoke with a start.
It's just a dream...
It was a good dream..
A dream that probably will never come true..
He wouldn't do that..
I couldn't do that either..
The place never existed..
Neither is the era..
Unless it is happening now in the repeating past somewhere in the world.
No one was there just the two of us.
He gave me a piece of paper.
My eyes could only be filled with tears of happiness as I read it again and again, to make sure it's not a dream.
I was crying with tears of happiness when suddenly a riiinnngg pierce through my ears..
I awoke with a start.
It's just a dream...
Saturday, November 12, 2011
One week more to go.. (posted last year)
One week left of schooling.
After that I won't see him everyday.
He's graduating this year :))
Imma happy for him.
He doesn't know it.
Maybe he does.
He just don't wanna know it.
He still hates me.
You know what??
ISTILLLOVEYOU.
Imma trying to keep maself busy.
So I wouldn't think about you.
It's working pretty badly...
Imma thinking about you more.
I love you.
MOST.
I miss you.
I hope you could come to school next year to do your work instead of staying home...
Please don't evael...
Taht naht esrow si gnihton...
I still remember on that second day of Convention.
You turned to Chorintians 4:13and asked me to read it.
After that I won't see him everyday.
He's graduating this year :))
Imma happy for him.
He doesn't know it.
Maybe he does.
He just don't wanna know it.
He still hates me.
You know what??
ISTILLLOVEYOU.
Imma trying to keep maself busy.
So I wouldn't think about you.
It's working pretty badly...
Imma thinking about you more.
I love you.
MOST.
I miss you.
I hope you could come to school next year to do your work instead of staying home...
Please don't evael...
Taht naht esrow si gnihton...
I still remember on that second day of Convention.
You turned to Chorintians 4:13and asked me to read it.
STILLLOVINYA
Yea.
Imma stupid
Imma immature
Imma dumb
Imma in LOVE.
I've read about a fact.
It only happens to some people.
The person who dumps the girl or guy, the girl or guy will love the person much more than they did when they were together.
I found that fact true about me.
That's stupid.
Yea.
He hates me
He ignores me
He doesn't talk to me
BUTISTILLLOVEHIM.
(bet you can't read that) :P
Maybe you could.. DX XD
Yea.
ILOVEHIMILOVEHIMILOVEHIMILOVEHIMILOVEHIMILOVEHIM.
I still do.
What you have said to me.
I don't hate you.
I don't think I ever will :P
On the day I become a retard. I'll hate you.
Which it'll never come.
Or when I have amnesia.
Which I'll never get :P
You can't stop me from missing ya!!!!
And lovin ya :3
I wish you could become my friend.
That's my wish on 11.11.11.
It's worth a try right?
I wish you would just unblock me on Facebook.
I swear I wouldn't poke you again if you friend me back.
I'll try my best not to. >.<"
I went to your taman just now.
I can't stop thinking about you and my heart beats faster the nearer I drove to your house.
But I never turn inside your lane. :(((
I miss you. Why can't you see that?
Maybe you saw that everyday, and you just ignore it.
I wonder when are you gonna find it... :))))
Maybe not in another one month.
Maybe it'll be in the dumps already.
You never told me anything anymore..
I miss the old times.
I miss them soooo very much.
Imma trying to smile for you.
Imma trying not to cry everyday cuz you don't want me to.
Imma still keeping that promise.
HA! YOU DON'T KNOW WHICH ONE :P
I miss the times when we at least said hi to each other everyday of the month when we can
I believed you.
I should have just listened to you on that day....
I was dumb.
Stupid.
I just wanted to be by your side longer.
You were my happiness everyday.
At home
At church
At school
At my neighbourhood
Remember once we sneaked out together so we could meet and talk???
Now I just wanna sneak out my window and see you.
I wanna do that everyday.
Everynight.
I miss you..
Everyday.
I'll be waiting for an SMS or call from you.
They never came.
And I still waited.
It's on silent.
But I stare at it everytime I can.
I even let it switched on at night and during school time, in case you'll SMS me.
I wonder if you deleted me from your contacts.
But I know you wouldn't forget my number
Cuz it's so easy to remember.
You won't have trouble remembering it.
I know you won't.
Imma stupid
Imma immature
Imma dumb
Imma in LOVE.
I've read about a fact.
It only happens to some people.
The person who dumps the girl or guy, the girl or guy will love the person much more than they did when they were together.
I found that fact true about me.
That's stupid.
Yea.
He hates me
He ignores me
He doesn't talk to me
BUTISTILLLOVEHIM.
(bet you can't read that) :P
Maybe you could.. DX XD
Yea.
ILOVEHIMILOVEHIMILOVEHIMILOVEHIMILOVEHIMILOVEHIM.
I still do.
What you have said to me.
I don't hate you.
I don't think I ever will :P
On the day I become a retard. I'll hate you.
Which it'll never come.
Or when I have amnesia.
Which I'll never get :P
You can't stop me from missing ya!!!!
And lovin ya :3
I wish you could become my friend.
That's my wish on 11.11.11.
It's worth a try right?
I wish you would just unblock me on Facebook.
I swear I wouldn't poke you again if you friend me back.
I'll try my best not to. >.<"
I went to your taman just now.
I can't stop thinking about you and my heart beats faster the nearer I drove to your house.
But I never turn inside your lane. :(((
I miss you. Why can't you see that?
Maybe you saw that everyday, and you just ignore it.
I wonder when are you gonna find it... :))))
Maybe not in another one month.
Maybe it'll be in the dumps already.
You never told me anything anymore..
I miss the old times.
I miss them soooo very much.
Imma trying to smile for you.
Imma trying not to cry everyday cuz you don't want me to.
Imma still keeping that promise.
HA! YOU DON'T KNOW WHICH ONE :P
I miss the times when we at least said hi to each other everyday of the month when we can
I believed you.
I should have just listened to you on that day....
I was dumb.
Stupid.
I just wanted to be by your side longer.
You were my happiness everyday.
At home
At church
At school
At my neighbourhood
Remember once we sneaked out together so we could meet and talk???
Now I just wanna sneak out my window and see you.
I wanna do that everyday.
Everynight.
I miss you..
Everyday.
I'll be waiting for an SMS or call from you.
They never came.
And I still waited.
It's on silent.
But I stare at it everytime I can.
I even let it switched on at night and during school time, in case you'll SMS me.
I wonder if you deleted me from your contacts.
But I know you wouldn't forget my number
Cuz it's so easy to remember.
You won't have trouble remembering it.
I know you won't.
Monday, October 31, 2011
Monday Chapel
Like every other day, today is Monday. Chapel Day, and WHERE ARE YOU JONATHAN???
Jonathan, did you know that the chapel sounded rather weird without your lively drums??
It was weird, everybody is like going out of tune and loosing the hype.
You were sick in bed!! DX
Sincerely, I really did, I prayed for you.
Yea, hate me for that.
Yea, hate me for caring.
Yea, hate me for thinking about you.
I don't hate you.
I won't hate you back.
Yea, hate me for that too.
I don't care. I don't care. I don't care.
I just want you healthy and safe again.
Get well soon Jonathan :)
Jonathan, did you know that the chapel sounded rather weird without your lively drums??
It was weird, everybody is like going out of tune and loosing the hype.
You were sick in bed!! DX
Sincerely, I really did, I prayed for you.
Yea, hate me for that.
Yea, hate me for caring.
Yea, hate me for thinking about you.
I don't hate you.
I won't hate you back.
Yea, hate me for that too.
I don't care. I don't care. I don't care.
I just want you healthy and safe again.
Get well soon Jonathan :)
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Papa and Mama..
Papa and mama are fighting again...
Why do they have to fight??
Why do they have to scream at each other??
Papa, mama can't answer your calls because she's busy too papa.
Mama, papa is impatient, mama, you know that, so don't scream at papa.
Papa, mama, today is a happy day, why do you have to feel angry at each other??
Papa, please be more patient,mama was busy the whole day today, she never got to rest...
Mama, I know you are tired, but don't take it out on papa.
Papa, mama doesn't have the phone everytime like you do. Mama was in the shower when you called twice, and mama was driving was you called thrice, and mama was picking me up when you called once more,papa please don't be angry at mama.
Mama, papa is eager to talk to me because he didn't see or talk to is for almost a week, papa miss us, so mama, please understand how papa feels.
Papa, please don't shout at mama, or else mama will be angry and sad, and then mama will take it out on us..
Mama, please don't take it out on us... Please don't be angry mama.. Don't scream at us too..
Papa, mama, please don't scream at each other when we can laugh together like a family...
Papa, mama, do you know what family means??
It means father and mother I love you. :)
Written in kid version,
Upset and confused.
Why do they have to fight??
Why do they have to scream at each other??
Papa, mama can't answer your calls because she's busy too papa.
Mama, papa is impatient, mama, you know that, so don't scream at papa.
Papa, mama, today is a happy day, why do you have to feel angry at each other??
Papa, please be more patient,mama was busy the whole day today, she never got to rest...
Mama, I know you are tired, but don't take it out on papa.
Papa, mama doesn't have the phone everytime like you do. Mama was in the shower when you called twice, and mama was driving was you called thrice, and mama was picking me up when you called once more,papa please don't be angry at mama.
Mama, papa is eager to talk to me because he didn't see or talk to is for almost a week, papa miss us, so mama, please understand how papa feels.
Papa, please don't shout at mama, or else mama will be angry and sad, and then mama will take it out on us..
Mama, please don't take it out on us... Please don't be angry mama.. Don't scream at us too..
Papa, mama, please don't scream at each other when we can laugh together like a family...
Papa, mama, do you know what family means??
It means father and mother I love you. :)
Written in kid version,
Upset and confused.
Wednesday, October 05, 2011
Stupid, dumb, bodoh, stupid...
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!!! DX
I LOST IT!!! I LOST ALL THE PICS?!?!?!?! DX
The pics were fine two days ago!!!
The videos were fine too!!!!
Now they are GONE!!!!!!!! DX
The computer says it's either corrupted or unreadable, I scanned it in school, I swear!!! There were no viruses!!!!!! DX
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!!!
I CAN'T LOSE THEM!!!!!!
I'LL NEVER GET THEM BACK!!!!!!
DX DX DX DX DX DX
IN DESPAIR AND UPSETNESS WITH MYSELF!!!! DX
eijyne's files have gone too!!! DX luckily I copied them in school.
LUCKY YOU EIJYNE!!!!! DX DX
I LOST IT!!! I LOST ALL THE PICS?!?!?!?! DX
The pics were fine two days ago!!!
The videos were fine too!!!!
Now they are GONE!!!!!!!! DX
The computer says it's either corrupted or unreadable, I scanned it in school, I swear!!! There were no viruses!!!!!! DX
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!!!
I CAN'T LOSE THEM!!!!!!
I'LL NEVER GET THEM BACK!!!!!!
DX DX DX DX DX DX
IN DESPAIR AND UPSETNESS WITH MYSELF!!!! DX
eijyne's files have gone too!!! DX luckily I copied them in school.
LUCKY YOU EIJYNE!!!!! DX DX
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Broken...
Ever lost someone you love so much? :(
I did...
I lost him.
I lost my Lover.
I lost my Beloved Symphony.
I lost Jonathan.
My tears can't stop flowing.
They won't stop.
Even when I'm asleep they'll fall from the corners of my eyes.
When I'm thinking of you, tears just leak out of my eyes.
I can't turn it off...
Not when I know you are not mine anymore...
Please come back Jonathan...
You were my EVERYTHING. When you leave me... My happiness will be gone...
You were always there when I wanted to see you... Though you may not know it.. The first day I came back from my vacation, the first person I saw was actually you. Your mum drove past us on the other side! I'm not sure you realized it... But I'm so happy!
Ever since I came back, the first person that I wanted to see was YOU!!
YOU, and no one else!!
I thought we will last till death brings us apart...
I thought we could go through any obstacle together, like always.
You can tell me anything, you can be straightfoward with me, tell me if you don't like what I'm doing, I'll change...
Tell me if you want me to go to church more often, I'll try my best to how my presence there.
Tell me if you hate me, I will change for you because you hate me.
Tell me if something is bothering you, we can work it out together, I'll try to fix us back together like nothing happened...
Tell me if you are sad, I'll make you smile
Tell me if I'm wrong, I'll make it right.
Tell me if you are angry, I'll be there if you feel like shouting or yelling at someone.
Tell me if you feel like crying, I'll sit beside you and give you my shoulder to cry on.
Tell me if you feel sleepy, I'll give you my lap to lie on and sing a song too if you like.
Tell me if you need a listening ear to listen to you, I'll keep quiet and listen to what you have to say.
Tell me if you feel moody, I'll try to make you laugh.
Tell me if you are happy, so both of us can be happy and laugh together
If you keep every problem to yourself, how am I suppose to know what's bothering you, I know you are sad, I can feel you are upset, but I don't know what you are thinking when you are upset, 100million things can go through your mind like lighting and I'm suppose to hit a bullseye at one, which might be the wrong problem that you are not seeking for help...
I love you Jonathan, you are the BEST thing which happened to me, I'll remind you again and again if I have to, because I love you...
I love you, I don't want you to be sad.
I love you, I don't want you to be angry.
I love you, I just want you to be happy and carefree.
You know it, you've experienced it, we can go through this together, all I need is you.
You know it, when you are gone, I'll be weird, I'll be worrying, I'll be sad, and I'll be emoing. You know it... If you don't, you do now :P
They laugh at me for being a silly douche who waited for you by the window for your return from the clinic from lunch till it ends..
I got laughed at again for waiting for you at the staircase to greet you good afternoon and welcome back to school when you were gone for half the day...
I don't mind doing all that stuff. Because I'm doing it for you, they are like my daily routine since I have nothing better to do than to sit around like a dumb blond... Even my supervisor pulled me to the senior class to mix around and talk.
When you left me, I don't know what else to do! You filled my free time in school and in my life. When you left me and I'm at home, I'm alone, ALL alone, shut up in my room doing nothing but my homework and not daring to come out in case my mum comes and attack me. Before that, you were there when I'm at home, you chatted with me on skype, you facebooked me, called me on the phone, annoyed me, texted me and was there with me.
I enjoyed everything I did with you, even tuition was much more fun now, I don't stare at my book for five minutes before I get one question done.
If we weren't together before we started convention, I'll be the weird outsider girl who never talks.
What's there to laugh and talk about when you are not there to insult and annoy me and laugh with me??
NOTHING.
I was preparing something special for you on Christmas...
I guess it won't work out when you are not my goal anymore...
I wish I was given the power to read your mind...
You frown when you are upset.
You don't smile if something is bothering you.
I just want to know what is that irritating question bothering you so I could push it away and bring a smile on your face again!!
I want another chance with you again, I'll be better than before, please forgive me for everything I did to you, nothing more, I'll won't do what you don't want me to do, I won't do it, tell me what you need, I'll try my best to give it to you, I'll be there for you.
God, I'm begging you, please let me have Jonathan back.
Please come back...
I need you...
Please please please....
Let me have Jonathan back, I'll promise I'll be a good girl.
Please just let me have another chance....
Why can't everybody just accept that humans are not separated by colors.
Why can't they just agree to something and the world would be a peaceful place.
Why can't they just agree on one thing and the world would be a better place.
Why can't they just accept that some individuals are made for another person.
The world wouldn't have problems.
Family wouldn't break apart. Lovers wouldn't need to break up.
Love never fails right??
Why is my family coming apart then???
You marry my mum for a reason, it's because you vowed that you will love her for life.
You marry my dad for a reason, cause he's the dream husband that you wanted.
You gave birth to me for a reason, so I would be loved by someone different in this world for who I am.
I was instilled by your sir name for a reason, so that I would be the tag that my lover would find.
God created us for a reason, because he created the world that he so loved and gave his only Son for us so that he would die on the cross for our sins.
Jonathan was born for a reason, so that he could meet the world later in life to honour God and receive love like his father and mother did.
Why can't my dad accept Christ??
Just accept that this one guy who is God's only son had died for the world and tries to make it a better place.
Just accept that it wasn't the Indians fault that Jonathan is a "black". HOW MANY TIMES DO I NEED TO TELL YOU THAT JONATHAN IS NOT BLACK!!!
We were all once White people. Only when after the Flood the continents got separated and they become tan people because they worked hard under the sun for us Chinese people.
They are not meant to born to serve under us. They choose who they want to serve and they'll do it. Some people serve Chritianity and Buddistism. God can strike down those who didn't obey him and worship him down like how we kill ants in a single swipe. He can easily do that, but he didn't, WHY??
Because he loves all of us no matter who or what Color we are...
What if no one is meant for me except him??
What if I was doomed to be single if I let Jonathan go??
I know God has prepared someone for me in life, but what if that someone is Jonathan??
If he's gone, it's like... My time has stopped.. I heart keep aching.. I dull thud, throb, and poke, every time I think of you. It's true!!!
Don't worry what other people say against us, you can listen. But they can't control what you really choose to choose or what to really think...
I don't want to end up like my mum.
Who gave her vow of love for life and virginity to someone who she loves and wanted a divorce after three years...
I don't wanna be like her, I wanna be better than her in this. I can show her and my dad not only Chinese people are MEANT TO BE WITH just Chinese people. I can show them that love has a far greater power than that....
Please Jonathan...
Don't leave...
Give me another chance...
I'll be better than last time...
Please...
Don't...
Leave...
I Love You...
I did...
I lost him.
I lost my Lover.
I lost my Beloved Symphony.
I lost Jonathan.
My tears can't stop flowing.
They won't stop.
Even when I'm asleep they'll fall from the corners of my eyes.
When I'm thinking of you, tears just leak out of my eyes.
I can't turn it off...
Not when I know you are not mine anymore...
Please come back Jonathan...
You were my EVERYTHING. When you leave me... My happiness will be gone...
You were always there when I wanted to see you... Though you may not know it.. The first day I came back from my vacation, the first person I saw was actually you. Your mum drove past us on the other side! I'm not sure you realized it... But I'm so happy!
Ever since I came back, the first person that I wanted to see was YOU!!
YOU, and no one else!!
I thought we will last till death brings us apart...
I thought we could go through any obstacle together, like always.
You can tell me anything, you can be straightfoward with me, tell me if you don't like what I'm doing, I'll change...
Tell me if you want me to go to church more often, I'll try my best to how my presence there.
Tell me if you hate me, I will change for you because you hate me.
Tell me if something is bothering you, we can work it out together, I'll try to fix us back together like nothing happened...
Tell me if you are sad, I'll make you smile
Tell me if I'm wrong, I'll make it right.
Tell me if you are angry, I'll be there if you feel like shouting or yelling at someone.
Tell me if you feel like crying, I'll sit beside you and give you my shoulder to cry on.
Tell me if you feel sleepy, I'll give you my lap to lie on and sing a song too if you like.
Tell me if you need a listening ear to listen to you, I'll keep quiet and listen to what you have to say.
Tell me if you feel moody, I'll try to make you laugh.
Tell me if you are happy, so both of us can be happy and laugh together
If you keep every problem to yourself, how am I suppose to know what's bothering you, I know you are sad, I can feel you are upset, but I don't know what you are thinking when you are upset, 100million things can go through your mind like lighting and I'm suppose to hit a bullseye at one, which might be the wrong problem that you are not seeking for help...
I love you Jonathan, you are the BEST thing which happened to me, I'll remind you again and again if I have to, because I love you...
I love you, I don't want you to be sad.
I love you, I don't want you to be angry.
I love you, I just want you to be happy and carefree.
You know it, you've experienced it, we can go through this together, all I need is you.
You know it, when you are gone, I'll be weird, I'll be worrying, I'll be sad, and I'll be emoing. You know it... If you don't, you do now :P
They laugh at me for being a silly douche who waited for you by the window for your return from the clinic from lunch till it ends..
I got laughed at again for waiting for you at the staircase to greet you good afternoon and welcome back to school when you were gone for half the day...
I don't mind doing all that stuff. Because I'm doing it for you, they are like my daily routine since I have nothing better to do than to sit around like a dumb blond... Even my supervisor pulled me to the senior class to mix around and talk.
When you left me, I don't know what else to do! You filled my free time in school and in my life. When you left me and I'm at home, I'm alone, ALL alone, shut up in my room doing nothing but my homework and not daring to come out in case my mum comes and attack me. Before that, you were there when I'm at home, you chatted with me on skype, you facebooked me, called me on the phone, annoyed me, texted me and was there with me.
I enjoyed everything I did with you, even tuition was much more fun now, I don't stare at my book for five minutes before I get one question done.
If we weren't together before we started convention, I'll be the weird outsider girl who never talks.
What's there to laugh and talk about when you are not there to insult and annoy me and laugh with me??
NOTHING.
I was preparing something special for you on Christmas...
I guess it won't work out when you are not my goal anymore...
I wish I was given the power to read your mind...
You frown when you are upset.
You don't smile if something is bothering you.
I just want to know what is that irritating question bothering you so I could push it away and bring a smile on your face again!!
I want another chance with you again, I'll be better than before, please forgive me for everything I did to you, nothing more, I'll won't do what you don't want me to do, I won't do it, tell me what you need, I'll try my best to give it to you, I'll be there for you.
God, I'm begging you, please let me have Jonathan back.
Please come back...
I need you...
Please please please....
Let me have Jonathan back, I'll promise I'll be a good girl.
Please just let me have another chance....
Why can't everybody just accept that humans are not separated by colors.
Why can't they just agree to something and the world would be a peaceful place.
Why can't they just agree on one thing and the world would be a better place.
Why can't they just accept that some individuals are made for another person.
The world wouldn't have problems.
Family wouldn't break apart. Lovers wouldn't need to break up.
Love never fails right??
Why is my family coming apart then???
You marry my mum for a reason, it's because you vowed that you will love her for life.
You marry my dad for a reason, cause he's the dream husband that you wanted.
You gave birth to me for a reason, so I would be loved by someone different in this world for who I am.
I was instilled by your sir name for a reason, so that I would be the tag that my lover would find.
God created us for a reason, because he created the world that he so loved and gave his only Son for us so that he would die on the cross for our sins.
Jonathan was born for a reason, so that he could meet the world later in life to honour God and receive love like his father and mother did.
Why can't my dad accept Christ??
Just accept that this one guy who is God's only son had died for the world and tries to make it a better place.
Just accept that it wasn't the Indians fault that Jonathan is a "black". HOW MANY TIMES DO I NEED TO TELL YOU THAT JONATHAN IS NOT BLACK!!!
We were all once White people. Only when after the Flood the continents got separated and they become tan people because they worked hard under the sun for us Chinese people.
They are not meant to born to serve under us. They choose who they want to serve and they'll do it. Some people serve Chritianity and Buddistism. God can strike down those who didn't obey him and worship him down like how we kill ants in a single swipe. He can easily do that, but he didn't, WHY??
Because he loves all of us no matter who or what Color we are...
What if no one is meant for me except him??
What if I was doomed to be single if I let Jonathan go??
I know God has prepared someone for me in life, but what if that someone is Jonathan??
If he's gone, it's like... My time has stopped.. I heart keep aching.. I dull thud, throb, and poke, every time I think of you. It's true!!!
Don't worry what other people say against us, you can listen. But they can't control what you really choose to choose or what to really think...
I don't want to end up like my mum.
Who gave her vow of love for life and virginity to someone who she loves and wanted a divorce after three years...
I don't wanna be like her, I wanna be better than her in this. I can show her and my dad not only Chinese people are MEANT TO BE WITH just Chinese people. I can show them that love has a far greater power than that....
Please Jonathan...
Don't leave...
Give me another chance...
I'll be better than last time...
Please...
Don't...
Leave...
I Love You...
Monday, September 19, 2011
Selling away Love
My dad came back today...
I TRIED!!! I REALLY TRIED!!!
I REALLY TRIED TO AVOID HIM!!! I DID!!
God forgive me...
Let's say, there's this girl who is 16, and her parents forced her to break up with her boyfriend which was EVERYTHING to her.
After a week, they questioned her whether she's till with him.
She unregretfully lied, no.
After three weeks, they questioned her again.
His faithful lover wasn't hesitant to say no.
After a month, they questioned her again.
The brave young gal replied with a firm no.
Ever since they lied that they had separated, her parents were desperately trying to find evidence against her replies... But fortunately they found none.
But nay, the day before 'twas the father who heard a tale that the girl was meeting him in secret...
The gal's soul was greatly troubled... She was unhappy... But her lover couldn't figure out why...
Little did her lover knew that her father reminded her damned promised to him and tried to give her 20dollars to make her happy again and forget her lover...
But nay, the gal didn't except a penny...
She was true to the promise she made with her lover...
The gal's emotions were a fury, she wanted to trash her room and scream out loud....
But nay, she held her control...
She was true to him till today and her lies were a mist that covers her true feelings for her lover forever.
So what do you think of this story?? :)
Would you ever think a girl would sell off her lover for a mere 20bucks??
I don't think I would sell my boyfriend off for the fortunes in the world. (:
IHEARTYOUSWEETY.
I WON'T SELL YOU AWAY :)
I TRIED!!! I REALLY TRIED!!!
I REALLY TRIED TO AVOID HIM!!! I DID!!
God forgive me...
Let's say, there's this girl who is 16, and her parents forced her to break up with her boyfriend which was EVERYTHING to her.
After a week, they questioned her whether she's till with him.
She unregretfully lied, no.
After three weeks, they questioned her again.
His faithful lover wasn't hesitant to say no.
After a month, they questioned her again.
The brave young gal replied with a firm no.
Ever since they lied that they had separated, her parents were desperately trying to find evidence against her replies... But fortunately they found none.
But nay, the day before 'twas the father who heard a tale that the girl was meeting him in secret...
The gal's soul was greatly troubled... She was unhappy... But her lover couldn't figure out why...
Little did her lover knew that her father reminded her damned promised to him and tried to give her 20dollars to make her happy again and forget her lover...
But nay, the gal didn't except a penny...
She was true to the promise she made with her lover...
The gal's emotions were a fury, she wanted to trash her room and scream out loud....
But nay, she held her control...
She was true to him till today and her lies were a mist that covers her true feelings for her lover forever.
So what do you think of this story?? :)
Would you ever think a girl would sell off her lover for a mere 20bucks??
I don't think I would sell my boyfriend off for the fortunes in the world. (:
IHEARTYOUSWEETY.
I WON'T SELL YOU AWAY :)
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Your return
You are coming back!!!
Back to Malaysia!! Coming back safely, back to school!!
I'm so happy!! :) just to hear the word Jonathan can let my heart fly to the skies.
I'm really really happy to know that you are coming back, I'm missing you quite badly...
If no one knows, I would climb up to your window and welcome you back 8D
IMISSYOUSOMUCHY. XD
Back to Malaysia!! Coming back safely, back to school!!
I'm so happy!! :) just to hear the word Jonathan can let my heart fly to the skies.
I'm really really happy to know that you are coming back, I'm missing you quite badly...
If no one knows, I would climb up to your window and welcome you back 8D
IMISSYOUSOMUCHY. XD
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
I'm gonna miss him...
My sweetheart is flying to Sabah!!!
NOT GOOD!!!!
PLEASE DON'T GO!!
No one is gonna replace you.
No one is gonna sit beside me.
No one is gonna sit with me.
No one is gonna hold my hand.
FOR MONDAY!!
MY FAVOURITE DAY OF THE WEEK, and you are not there with me :'(
You are going away for 4 days.
FOUR.
WHOLE.
DAYS.
WITHOUT.
YOU.
IT'S A TORTURE!!! DX
I was frantic I tell you!!
He didn't tell me he was flying on Thursday, which is tomorrow!!!
And I have to find out myself!!!
Luckily I did, if not I'll go crazy worrying after him....
I'm a worrier, I worry about people,but I don't worry about my own self... Stupid rite??
During Tuesday I was panicking!! I kept thinking of worst case scenarios!
The plane is not gonna crash rite? There won't be a terrorist bomb inside the plane right? He won't get run over by a plane or a car right? What if he got lost?! What if he got kidnapped?!?! And his organs are gonna be sold to the black Market!!! DX
Only God knows what will happen..
God, please take care and bring him and his family back home safely Lord, I pray that you'll send a legion of angels to protect him from evil and harm Lord. I'll be a good girl, but please don't let anything happen to him Lord. Amen...
I won't let him go if I could.
I will follow him if I'm allowed to.
I'll do anything, but please keep him safe.
I'm gonna miss him like crazy I tell you.
C. R. A. Z. Y.
I'm missing him like mad now...
You wanna know why I miss him like crazy??
I miss him cause he's my EVERYTHING.
Don't tell my parents kay?
Cause they'll snatch me away from him if you do :(
If he's gone, I don't know what I'll do, I can't live without him, I can't breathe without him, I can't love without him.
He's a BIG part that kinda completes me <3
I miss him like crazy.
I love him like crazy.
He's practically my oxygen I breathe ^_^
I'm gonna miss you Sweetheart,
From your Love :)
NOT GOOD!!!!
PLEASE DON'T GO!!
No one is gonna replace you.
No one is gonna sit beside me.
No one is gonna sit with me.
No one is gonna hold my hand.
FOR MONDAY!!
MY FAVOURITE DAY OF THE WEEK, and you are not there with me :'(
You are going away for 4 days.
FOUR.
WHOLE.
DAYS.
WITHOUT.
YOU.
IT'S A TORTURE!!! DX
I was frantic I tell you!!
He didn't tell me he was flying on Thursday, which is tomorrow!!!
And I have to find out myself!!!
Luckily I did, if not I'll go crazy worrying after him....
I'm a worrier, I worry about people,but I don't worry about my own self... Stupid rite??
During Tuesday I was panicking!! I kept thinking of worst case scenarios!
The plane is not gonna crash rite? There won't be a terrorist bomb inside the plane right? He won't get run over by a plane or a car right? What if he got lost?! What if he got kidnapped?!?! And his organs are gonna be sold to the black Market!!! DX
Only God knows what will happen..
God, please take care and bring him and his family back home safely Lord, I pray that you'll send a legion of angels to protect him from evil and harm Lord. I'll be a good girl, but please don't let anything happen to him Lord. Amen...
I won't let him go if I could.
I will follow him if I'm allowed to.
I'll do anything, but please keep him safe.
I'm gonna miss him like crazy I tell you.
C. R. A. Z. Y.
I'm missing him like mad now...
You wanna know why I miss him like crazy??
I miss him cause he's my EVERYTHING.
Don't tell my parents kay?
Cause they'll snatch me away from him if you do :(
If he's gone, I don't know what I'll do, I can't live without him, I can't breathe without him, I can't love without him.
He's a BIG part that kinda completes me <3
I miss him like crazy.
I love him like crazy.
He's practically my oxygen I breathe ^_^
I'm gonna miss you Sweetheart,
From your Love :)
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Touched
Hey, had someone ever touched your heart till you cry?
Well, I'm happy to know that someone I love had touched mine :)
I admit... I'm bad at maths, no one had ever taught me so kindly as Jonathan did. All I ever remember from my lessons of maths is shouts and rottan and insulting words and lastly.. My tears...
I hated maths ever since primary school cause my teacher picked on me...
Then during secondary, my dad shot me maths questions...
To tell you the truth, I did WELL in maths in school, I just don't know why I can't seem to calculate it when my dad asks for it. I couldn't tell him the right answer and what I got in return was insulting words and I always end up in tears...
Well.... I've never been treated so kindly that's for sure...
Okay, when I was having tuition.. Jonathan asked me a maths question, 20-13, freaking easy right?? Sure, that's what you say... But hey, I just don't know why, my brain got pretty messed up... And I answered 17.. I mean like what the heck? 20-13=17???
Well.. I got a soft slap on my head and you know what jonathan did? He put his arm over my shoulder and taught me the way to count!! I mean, not everyone does that.. At first, I was reluctant to hear what he was gonna say.. But I turn my head to see what he was doing anyway, he wrote down the formula down and asked me to count the rest well, it took about 4secs I got the answer right.. That's quite slow...
He didn't say anything to insult me, he didn't even say douche to me. All he say was, ok?
I just nodded my head.. I was stunned, I didn't say anything for a while... Then I burst to tears.. Literally.
I couldn't hold it in! I couldn't ! I tried!
He was freaked I tell you, he was like, are you okay? Are you okay?
I couldn't say anything... So I typed out for him, my eyes were a blur... But thanks to auto-correction spelling, I got the words out alright...
After reading, he says, my dad used to taught me maths this way, so I used it on you.
After I heard it, a new wave of tears crashed on me again...
You could say it's weird but, I felt touched and happy....but i also felt sad to know that my dad didn't taught me that way and used the hard way and left me to deal with it...
I told him, well, our dads are different....
He said, you just haven't realized the good side of your dad yet, but someday you will see it, okay?
I just nodded slighty... But doubts filled my mind..
I was just so so touched, if he didn't come today, I may never realize that someone could treat me like that...
I just wanna say my most heartfelt gratitude, thank you sweetheart :)
Well, I'm happy to know that someone I love had touched mine :)
I admit... I'm bad at maths, no one had ever taught me so kindly as Jonathan did. All I ever remember from my lessons of maths is shouts and rottan and insulting words and lastly.. My tears...
I hated maths ever since primary school cause my teacher picked on me...
Then during secondary, my dad shot me maths questions...
To tell you the truth, I did WELL in maths in school, I just don't know why I can't seem to calculate it when my dad asks for it. I couldn't tell him the right answer and what I got in return was insulting words and I always end up in tears...
Well.... I've never been treated so kindly that's for sure...
Okay, when I was having tuition.. Jonathan asked me a maths question, 20-13, freaking easy right?? Sure, that's what you say... But hey, I just don't know why, my brain got pretty messed up... And I answered 17.. I mean like what the heck? 20-13=17???
Well.. I got a soft slap on my head and you know what jonathan did? He put his arm over my shoulder and taught me the way to count!! I mean, not everyone does that.. At first, I was reluctant to hear what he was gonna say.. But I turn my head to see what he was doing anyway, he wrote down the formula down and asked me to count the rest well, it took about 4secs I got the answer right.. That's quite slow...
He didn't say anything to insult me, he didn't even say douche to me. All he say was, ok?
I just nodded my head.. I was stunned, I didn't say anything for a while... Then I burst to tears.. Literally.
I couldn't hold it in! I couldn't ! I tried!
He was freaked I tell you, he was like, are you okay? Are you okay?
I couldn't say anything... So I typed out for him, my eyes were a blur... But thanks to auto-correction spelling, I got the words out alright...
After reading, he says, my dad used to taught me maths this way, so I used it on you.
After I heard it, a new wave of tears crashed on me again...
You could say it's weird but, I felt touched and happy....but i also felt sad to know that my dad didn't taught me that way and used the hard way and left me to deal with it...
I told him, well, our dads are different....
He said, you just haven't realized the good side of your dad yet, but someday you will see it, okay?
I just nodded slighty... But doubts filled my mind..
I was just so so touched, if he didn't come today, I may never realize that someone could treat me like that...
I just wanna say my most heartfelt gratitude, thank you sweetheart :)
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Oh God....
God can only help me now....
My grandfather's life is in your hands Lord....
Please take care of him...
Please Lord, give him strength to stay strong...
Please don't let him fall into Death's hands....
Please...please......
My grandfather's life is in your hands Lord....
Please take care of him...
Please Lord, give him strength to stay strong...
Please don't let him fall into Death's hands....
Please...please......
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Church
Sundays are suppose to be the days where we go to church and worship the Lord, right?
Well, this morning I wanted to go to church because I want to give my blessings and prayers to my grandpa who is having an operation tomorrow.
But then, my mum isn't wake up, she even said, "come sleep with mummy...." I was like, "No, I have to go to church today." and she said, "Don't want lar~ stay with me..." when she says that, she means making me stay at home and doing nothing till dinner.
I had to go to church, it's been a long time since I've went there....
But my brother has to prevent me from waking her up. He used a pillow to hit me when I try to wake her up.
In the end I had to raise my voice, then I got scolded and questioned, "Why the last time I want you to go to church and you didn't even try to wake up? Why re you making us go to church now? Pipes up my irritating brother.
For one reason I couldn't answer her, and I had to say my second reason, which was giving my offering to god so that he can give my part of my blessings to my grandpa, I know it doesn't work that way, but it's worth a try...
I love my grandpa... I don't want anything bad to happen to him during the surgery...
All I can do now is pray and hope.
Well, this morning I wanted to go to church because I want to give my blessings and prayers to my grandpa who is having an operation tomorrow.
But then, my mum isn't wake up, she even said, "come sleep with mummy...." I was like, "No, I have to go to church today." and she said, "Don't want lar~ stay with me..." when she says that, she means making me stay at home and doing nothing till dinner.
I had to go to church, it's been a long time since I've went there....
But my brother has to prevent me from waking her up. He used a pillow to hit me when I try to wake her up.
In the end I had to raise my voice, then I got scolded and questioned, "Why the last time I want you to go to church and you didn't even try to wake up? Why re you making us go to church now? Pipes up my irritating brother.
For one reason I couldn't answer her, and I had to say my second reason, which was giving my offering to god so that he can give my part of my blessings to my grandpa, I know it doesn't work that way, but it's worth a try...
I love my grandpa... I don't want anything bad to happen to him during the surgery...
All I can do now is pray and hope.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Studies...
I always had good grades for my studies, well, some of them.
I love art more than anything, okay. I make things and draw things. I love to do all things related to art. But that doesn't make me not study.
Today my dad complained that I don't study and I shut myself up in my room the whole day, only God knows what I'm doing inside.
Well, truth to be told, I WAS doing my homework, not studying, this school's subjects need not be studied. After that I was drawing out something. And then there was dinner time an I had to go down to help.
I purposely spent one hour in the kitchen washing up the dishes which my mum didn't bother help.
I always keep myself busy from my dad in case he asks me something personal... I hate it when I'm left alone with him, because he asks me things which I am reluctant to answer.
Anyways, I studied okay! It's not like I don't study in school too! Weekdays are supposed to be relaxing days, I had a headache just by looking at crumpled up words!
Plus, he never bothers to look at my report cards. He never bothered about my grades in school. He wasn't even listening when I told him my working pace was constant ever since I met Jonathan!!
What can I expect from him? He is not a man to listen... When he's furious, he's terrifying. I don't want to be there if he does... He can make me cry when he says, "Didn't you ever studied this?" or "you really didn't study at all!"
It hurts when I know I did study that but I made a mistake in answering them....
He rarely forgives...
I love art more than anything, okay. I make things and draw things. I love to do all things related to art. But that doesn't make me not study.
Today my dad complained that I don't study and I shut myself up in my room the whole day, only God knows what I'm doing inside.
Well, truth to be told, I WAS doing my homework, not studying, this school's subjects need not be studied. After that I was drawing out something. And then there was dinner time an I had to go down to help.
I purposely spent one hour in the kitchen washing up the dishes which my mum didn't bother help.
I always keep myself busy from my dad in case he asks me something personal... I hate it when I'm left alone with him, because he asks me things which I am reluctant to answer.
Anyways, I studied okay! It's not like I don't study in school too! Weekdays are supposed to be relaxing days, I had a headache just by looking at crumpled up words!
Plus, he never bothers to look at my report cards. He never bothered about my grades in school. He wasn't even listening when I told him my working pace was constant ever since I met Jonathan!!
What can I expect from him? He is not a man to listen... When he's furious, he's terrifying. I don't want to be there if he does... He can make me cry when he says, "Didn't you ever studied this?" or "you really didn't study at all!"
It hurts when I know I did study that but I made a mistake in answering them....
He rarely forgives...
Perverts
Yesterday night I thought it was a joke, my mum pulled up my short skirt IN FRONT OF THE ROAD to check whether I was wearing a shorter shorts inside.
IT WAS SO HUMILIATING AND SHAMEFUL!!!
Plus!! My house has CCTV which had captured the full view of the act!!
She said nothing to apologize!!!
I was sooo angry!!
But I had forgave her till today again.
THIS TIME MY DAD DID IT!!
Firstly, I wore short skirt again to go out, but before we go, my mum told me to wear a pair of tights, I changed. I was fine with it.
When we went out, my DAD suddenly LIFTED UP my skirt AGAIN!!!!
As a reaction, I slapped his arm pretty hard, luckily I didn't slap his face, I wanted to. My mum said, "Why did you slap your dad so hard?!"
Then I said, "He lifted up my skirt in public, how do you want me to react?!"
Then my mum replied, "Nothing to see what..." and Went in the car.
In additional to my anger, my dad didn't even apologize!!!!
HOW THE HELL DO YOU WANT ME TO REACT TO THAT!!!
You are just lucky you are not a stranger!!
Or you'll never have father's day ever again.
But AT LEAST!! Show your own daughter some RESPECT!!!
Doing such a humiliating and shameful act to your own daughter, IN PUBLIC TOO!!
and the worst is NOT APOLOGIZING FOR IT!!
IT WAS SO HUMILIATING AND SHAMEFUL!!!
Plus!! My house has CCTV which had captured the full view of the act!!
She said nothing to apologize!!!
I was sooo angry!!
But I had forgave her till today again.
THIS TIME MY DAD DID IT!!
Firstly, I wore short skirt again to go out, but before we go, my mum told me to wear a pair of tights, I changed. I was fine with it.
When we went out, my DAD suddenly LIFTED UP my skirt AGAIN!!!!
As a reaction, I slapped his arm pretty hard, luckily I didn't slap his face, I wanted to. My mum said, "Why did you slap your dad so hard?!"
Then I said, "He lifted up my skirt in public, how do you want me to react?!"
Then my mum replied, "Nothing to see what..." and Went in the car.
In additional to my anger, my dad didn't even apologize!!!!
HOW THE HELL DO YOU WANT ME TO REACT TO THAT!!!
You are just lucky you are not a stranger!!
Or you'll never have father's day ever again.
But AT LEAST!! Show your own daughter some RESPECT!!!
Doing such a humiliating and shameful act to your own daughter, IN PUBLIC TOO!!
and the worst is NOT APOLOGIZING FOR IT!!
Friday, August 12, 2011
I can do nothing against it...
There is nothing I can say to defend myself....
NOTHING!!!
It was Friday, we just came back from dinner, today the teens are having a meeting like every other Fridays, I was the only one there whose parents won't let me go...
I asked rather politely whether I can go for tonight's meeting or not, my mum says if there is time then she'll let me go.
We were coming back the Curve and by the time we reach Puchong, it was 9:53 it was exactly at that time when we reach the flyover bridge in front of Giant.
I asked again, in case she forgot, to fetch me to teens meeting. She said rather rudely, "no lah, so late already go for what?"
And my dad pipes in and say, "No! Don't let her go, it's late already and she needs rest."
I was so pissed and disappointed and on the verge of angry tears. I had to keep my cool, I had no choice, or they'll suspect something is wrong... I can't let them know...
I could do nothing against it... I can do nothing about it... Nobody can help me.... Accept for god... But nothing was done... I tried praying that I'll reach there in time for the meeting, it worked, but I didn't forsee this was gonna happen....
I went back home and had discovered at least someone cares.... Yes, you. You know who you are :) Thank you for caring, "if you know what I mean" (;
I was happy. So happy to see that someone cares... :') so very happy.... :)
And I'm sorry for not coming... I tried my best, but arguing with my parents is not gonna happen.. I'll lose.. I'm sorry... :'(
NOTHING!!!
It was Friday, we just came back from dinner, today the teens are having a meeting like every other Fridays, I was the only one there whose parents won't let me go...
I asked rather politely whether I can go for tonight's meeting or not, my mum says if there is time then she'll let me go.
We were coming back the Curve and by the time we reach Puchong, it was 9:53 it was exactly at that time when we reach the flyover bridge in front of Giant.
I asked again, in case she forgot, to fetch me to teens meeting. She said rather rudely, "no lah, so late already go for what?"
And my dad pipes in and say, "No! Don't let her go, it's late already and she needs rest."
I was so pissed and disappointed and on the verge of angry tears. I had to keep my cool, I had no choice, or they'll suspect something is wrong... I can't let them know...
I could do nothing against it... I can do nothing about it... Nobody can help me.... Accept for god... But nothing was done... I tried praying that I'll reach there in time for the meeting, it worked, but I didn't forsee this was gonna happen....
I went back home and had discovered at least someone cares.... Yes, you. You know who you are :) Thank you for caring, "if you know what I mean" (;
I was happy. So happy to see that someone cares... :') so very happy.... :)
And I'm sorry for not coming... I tried my best, but arguing with my parents is not gonna happen.. I'll lose.. I'm sorry... :'(
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Insulting
Guess what will a son from a racist family will say to his sister?
"Are you a racist?"
That's what he said to me, and you know how insulting that is when I have a boyfriend who is an Indian????????
IT IS VERY INSULTING!!!
And when I screamed at him my answer, he said "I was only joking...geez what's wrong with you?"
WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH ME???
YOU DARE ASK WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH ME?!?!?!
YOU HAVE JUST FISHING INSULTED ME AND MY BOYFRIEND!!!!
And then there's another member in the household, she asked me yesterday to go out in the slight rain to look for the owner of a rooster who had attacked our chicken, and guess what time it is? IT'S SEVEN THIRTY IN THE EVENING WOMAN!!! AND YOU EXPECT ME TO SEARCH FOR A CHICKEN AT THIS TIME?!
You're just crazy.
And then there's another who is not satisfied with how the way the meat is cut!!! How stupid is that?!?!
Well, I tell you this, if you are not satisfied the way how your meat is cut, why don't you give a hand to the kitchen?!?!?!
Some people are just so hard to please...
And only some stupid people will ask his sister whether she's a racist or not.
OBVIOUSLY I'M NOT A RACIST!!
I'm dating an indian for goodness sake!!
How could I be a racist when I love people or who they are??
"Are you a racist?"
That's what he said to me, and you know how insulting that is when I have a boyfriend who is an Indian????????
IT IS VERY INSULTING!!!
And when I screamed at him my answer, he said "I was only joking...geez what's wrong with you?"
WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH ME???
YOU DARE ASK WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH ME?!?!?!
YOU HAVE JUST FISHING INSULTED ME AND MY BOYFRIEND!!!!
And then there's another member in the household, she asked me yesterday to go out in the slight rain to look for the owner of a rooster who had attacked our chicken, and guess what time it is? IT'S SEVEN THIRTY IN THE EVENING WOMAN!!! AND YOU EXPECT ME TO SEARCH FOR A CHICKEN AT THIS TIME?!
You're just crazy.
And then there's another who is not satisfied with how the way the meat is cut!!! How stupid is that?!?!
Well, I tell you this, if you are not satisfied the way how your meat is cut, why don't you give a hand to the kitchen?!?!?!
Some people are just so hard to please...
And only some stupid people will ask his sister whether she's a racist or not.
OBVIOUSLY I'M NOT A RACIST!!
I'm dating an indian for goodness sake!!
How could I be a racist when I love people or who they are??
Tuesday, August 02, 2011
Throwing a fit
Can you believe it or not? I've never thrown a fit, either verbally or emotionally... XD
Some people would have at least did it once or twice already in their lives, but I didn't... Not even once..
Why? I was taught to never show my emotions to people easily... That's why I'm also known as the quiet girl... And sometimes, being silent is not golden.. People will start to call you a freak...
I've seen many people throw a fit... It's scary... I don't know how will I be able to do that...
Maybe I will do that one day.. Just not now...
I wish I can throw a fit... Then maybe I could get back what I've lost...
Well.. That's a wrong thing to do that's for sure..
I can't imagine myself throwing a fit or even hyperventilating...
I mean, what's the point of throwing a fit??
You get hypertension, hot temper, and blood circulating too fast in your head that you'll get dizzy.
If you punched a wall or something just to get your anger out, what's the point?
All you'll get is a red fist!
Why not soothe the soul with some good words? :)
Some people would have at least did it once or twice already in their lives, but I didn't... Not even once..
Why? I was taught to never show my emotions to people easily... That's why I'm also known as the quiet girl... And sometimes, being silent is not golden.. People will start to call you a freak...
I've seen many people throw a fit... It's scary... I don't know how will I be able to do that...
Maybe I will do that one day.. Just not now...
I wish I can throw a fit... Then maybe I could get back what I've lost...
Well.. That's a wrong thing to do that's for sure..
I can't imagine myself throwing a fit or even hyperventilating...
I mean, what's the point of throwing a fit??
You get hypertension, hot temper, and blood circulating too fast in your head that you'll get dizzy.
If you punched a wall or something just to get your anger out, what's the point?
All you'll get is a red fist!
Why not soothe the soul with some good words? :)
Monday, August 01, 2011
Plain irritating...
Hey, I get your point that you were trying to insult him, but there's no need to remind me that what I'm doing now is "WRONG".
I know that you are just plain mean though you say you don't mean it, I get your point woman..
Is it a crime in loving someone other than my own race now???
Though I don't study law, but I think there is no such law on you can't marry a person different than you are.
Isn't marrying people different than me is the point of being different in this world?
You are just plain selfish, keeping me all to yourselves and not sharing me with the world!!
Sure, you can give me everything you want to keep me inside...everything that I asked to keep me busy from communicating to the world..
So what if I talked to him privately? It's not like we are planning to have sex in a hotel isn't it??
Something's are just not meant to be heard to other people.
I have grown up! I'm not a kid anymore!! I'm 16 for goodness sake!!
Why can't yOu just leave me to do my own things like a mature lady?!
Locked up...
Elaine
I know that you are just plain mean though you say you don't mean it, I get your point woman..
Is it a crime in loving someone other than my own race now???
Though I don't study law, but I think there is no such law on you can't marry a person different than you are.
Isn't marrying people different than me is the point of being different in this world?
You are just plain selfish, keeping me all to yourselves and not sharing me with the world!!
Sure, you can give me everything you want to keep me inside...everything that I asked to keep me busy from communicating to the world..
So what if I talked to him privately? It's not like we are planning to have sex in a hotel isn't it??
Something's are just not meant to be heard to other people.
I have grown up! I'm not a kid anymore!! I'm 16 for goodness sake!!
Why can't yOu just leave me to do my own things like a mature lady?!
Locked up...
Elaine
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Endless calls...
Ringing ringing baby,
My phone is ringing..
Why aren't I pickin it up?
Someone's not there to do it, baby..
Whole night long, you've been calling...
Sometimes, words cone popping out into my mind at random times...
I get inspired when I see somethings....
For example, I read some song lyrics, then I can write out a poem story out from it, I don't know how.. But I do..
It's been happening quite frequent now these days....
I space out a lot for a lot of reasons....
One reason for example... I think a lot...
Before I get any personal..
I think I'll stop from here...
Inspired,
Elaine
My phone is ringing..
Why aren't I pickin it up?
Someone's not there to do it, baby..
Whole night long, you've been calling...
Sometimes, words cone popping out into my mind at random times...
I get inspired when I see somethings....
For example, I read some song lyrics, then I can write out a poem story out from it, I don't know how.. But I do..
It's been happening quite frequent now these days....
I space out a lot for a lot of reasons....
One reason for example... I think a lot...
Before I get any personal..
I think I'll stop from here...
Inspired,
Elaine
Friday, July 29, 2011
Colors of the world
Hey, let me ask you this question, aren't we all human beings?
We, as being the same and EQUAL human beings...
We have arms, legs, body, heart, lungs, nose, eyes, ears, fingers, toes, hand, ad mouth and etc etc.... I'm sure mOst of us have it.
So what's the difference if they are black or brown??
That doesn't change who they are.
That doesn't change who they are on the inside.
That doesn't change the way we all speak.
That doesn't change the way they live.
That doesn't change the way they feel.
AND THAT DOESN'T CHANGE THE WAY THEY LOOK!!!
So what if they are black or brown?!?!
They are still human beings!! SAME AS WHITE PEOPLE!!
They breathe the same air as us!!
They eat the same things as us!!
They use the same language we speak!!
So what if they are slightly tanned?!?!?!
I'm sure THAT doesn't change the way they feel, think, speak, eat, or live...
They are still the same as us!! People!!
So what if their history are bad??
So what if their ancestors were once servants for our ancestors???
THAT doesn't change who they ARE does it??
THE PAST IS THE PAST PEOPLE!! This is the NEW GENERATION I'm speaking about!!!
Not the history or their "tainted" lives!!
I don't see the way you people see it.
I don't mind they way they look.
As long as they are human beings!!
Their past history is nothing, compare to the history NOW!!
Everyone has a different scent! I can prove it! How do you think do dogs differs cate their own masters and enemies? Dogs can't see Color, it's their masters and enemies scent!
If you say other people smell bad, do you think you smell that good??
NO!!
Everyone has their own unique scent and habits and characteristics.
The world isn't made just for White people to live in, it's for the blacks and the whites!!
The world is made for God's children! Not just you in the world!
Selfishness is a sin...
We have different identities to differs cate ourselves...
I don't see a problem in living the same world, same country, same land as they are living.
That's what the quote 1Malaysia says right? :)
One world, one country, one race(human beings, not blacks or whites, but human beings).
That d
We, as being the same and EQUAL human beings...
We have arms, legs, body, heart, lungs, nose, eyes, ears, fingers, toes, hand, ad mouth and etc etc.... I'm sure mOst of us have it.
So what's the difference if they are black or brown??
That doesn't change who they are.
That doesn't change who they are on the inside.
That doesn't change the way we all speak.
That doesn't change the way they live.
That doesn't change the way they feel.
AND THAT DOESN'T CHANGE THE WAY THEY LOOK!!!
So what if they are black or brown?!?!
They are still human beings!! SAME AS WHITE PEOPLE!!
They breathe the same air as us!!
They eat the same things as us!!
They use the same language we speak!!
So what if they are slightly tanned?!?!?!
I'm sure THAT doesn't change the way they feel, think, speak, eat, or live...
They are still the same as us!! People!!
So what if their history are bad??
So what if their ancestors were once servants for our ancestors???
THAT doesn't change who they ARE does it??
THE PAST IS THE PAST PEOPLE!! This is the NEW GENERATION I'm speaking about!!!
Not the history or their "tainted" lives!!
I don't see the way you people see it.
I don't mind they way they look.
As long as they are human beings!!
Their past history is nothing, compare to the history NOW!!
Everyone has a different scent! I can prove it! How do you think do dogs differs cate their own masters and enemies? Dogs can't see Color, it's their masters and enemies scent!
If you say other people smell bad, do you think you smell that good??
NO!!
Everyone has their own unique scent and habits and characteristics.
The world isn't made just for White people to live in, it's for the blacks and the whites!!
The world is made for God's children! Not just you in the world!
Selfishness is a sin...
We have different identities to differs cate ourselves...
I don't see a problem in living the same world, same country, same land as they are living.
That's what the quote 1Malaysia says right? :)
One world, one country, one race(human beings, not blacks or whites, but human beings).
That d
Anger..
It solves nothing at all..
Anger, solves nothing AT ALL!!
The more a person is angry, the angry words will only add fire to it...
Why can't the world be forgiving...
If we all are willing to forgive.. There wouldn't be war... There wouldn't be arguments.. There wouldn't be heartbreaks too.. At all..
Forgiveness..
Surely it is not something easy to forgive when someone forces you to separate your loved ones..
Technically.. Everyone hates that...
If I take your most favourite possession away, and break it, surely you won't forgive me..
So, if someone breaks my loved one's heart, he or she WILL NOT BE FORGIVEN TILL THE DEPTHS OF YOUR GRAVES....
no matter who you are...
Anger, solves nothing AT ALL!!
The more a person is angry, the angry words will only add fire to it...
Why can't the world be forgiving...
If we all are willing to forgive.. There wouldn't be war... There wouldn't be arguments.. There wouldn't be heartbreaks too.. At all..
Forgiveness..
Surely it is not something easy to forgive when someone forces you to separate your loved ones..
Technically.. Everyone hates that...
If I take your most favourite possession away, and break it, surely you won't forgive me..
So, if someone breaks my loved one's heart, he or she WILL NOT BE FORGIVEN TILL THE DEPTHS OF YOUR GRAVES....
no matter who you are...
A tale in our hands..
If I were to write out a sad romance story.. I will be willing to write it.. The plot and characters are right on my fingertips...
If i were to have the authority to convert Romeo and Juliet's plot into modern plot, I'll write it just as good as Shakespear did..
Sadness...
Endless craving...
Dissapointments...
Anger...
Cruelty...
Selfishness...
Trust...
Lust...
Blood...
Tears...
Love...
Happiness...
Joy...
Hope...
God...
These are the things which could describe the story of mine perfectly...
If i were to have the authority to convert Romeo and Juliet's plot into modern plot, I'll write it just as good as Shakespear did..
Sadness...
Endless craving...
Dissapointments...
Anger...
Cruelty...
Selfishness...
Trust...
Lust...
Blood...
Tears...
Love...
Happiness...
Joy...
Hope...
God...
These are the things which could describe the story of mine perfectly...
Saddening tale...
Hey, that's what life is all about isn't it??
Being sad, upset, angry, disappointed, hurt, and broken..
Happiness is what cheers you up when you are down...
And I know the only person who can cheer me up now...
He's here but he's not..
He's right beside me!
Why is this getting any harder??
Why is it happening only to us???
Why not them??
Why us??
Being sad, upset, angry, disappointed, hurt, and broken..
Happiness is what cheers you up when you are down...
And I know the only person who can cheer me up now...
He's here but he's not..
He's right beside me!
Why is this getting any harder??
Why is it happening only to us???
Why not them??
Why us??
Saturday, June 18, 2011
Lead us not into temptation but deliver us from the Evil One...
Speak nay with thy mouth if thou hath nothing good to say, or thine own words pierce through hearts like a thousand needles...
Thou wilt regret and suffer in thine depression of a lost dear one, it is thine own fault and thou shalt suffer for it...
Sin thou shalt not commit for thine own good...
For the Father of Heavens shalt judge upon thine own words and on thine own deeds...
Repent! Oh children of God, and admit that thou hath sinned down to the very drop of blood thine has in thine own flesh...
Let ye be cleansed and renewed by the Spirit and serve thine Father with renewed mind and soul..
And let thine own renewed flesh be the temple for the Holy Spirit...
Thou wilt regret and suffer in thine depression of a lost dear one, it is thine own fault and thou shalt suffer for it...
Sin thou shalt not commit for thine own good...
For the Father of Heavens shalt judge upon thine own words and on thine own deeds...
Repent! Oh children of God, and admit that thou hath sinned down to the very drop of blood thine has in thine own flesh...
Let ye be cleansed and renewed by the Spirit and serve thine Father with renewed mind and soul..
And let thine own renewed flesh be the temple for the Holy Spirit...
Wasted... All of it...
It's already nearly the end of June... Time really flies... And then soon we'll go to college and maybe we won't see each other again...
If only we were given eternal time...
If only we were given chances...
If only... If only...
These wishes are only asked by mere selfish humans...
They regret in nearly everything they do...
Yes, I'm only a mere selfish human being, and I assume you are too...
No one is perfect for everyone has sinned...
I'm not perfect either, neither are you...
Adults regret when they are old and weary... They regretted what they did in the past and what they did not do in the future...
Did I not say all humans are selfish?
They wanted their own generation to suffer and regret like how they did now.
I wonder if they had ever thought about our feelings...
Chances, challenges and opportunities are always limited to me...
I'm limited by mere selfish human beings...
Cruelty or over-protectiveness??
Elaine
If only we were given eternal time...
If only we were given chances...
If only... If only...
These wishes are only asked by mere selfish humans...
They regret in nearly everything they do...
Yes, I'm only a mere selfish human being, and I assume you are too...
No one is perfect for everyone has sinned...
I'm not perfect either, neither are you...
Adults regret when they are old and weary... They regretted what they did in the past and what they did not do in the future...
Did I not say all humans are selfish?
They wanted their own generation to suffer and regret like how they did now.
I wonder if they had ever thought about our feelings...
Chances, challenges and opportunities are always limited to me...
I'm limited by mere selfish human beings...
Cruelty or over-protectiveness??
Elaine
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Beloved's Symphony...
Jonathan Thomas Kuruvilla, age 16, awesome boyfriend, talented man...
We are of the same age...studying in the same school...going to the same tuition...going out for school trips together...going out for a party treat together....and going to church together.... That's quite a lot of together isn't it??? XD
We, like most couples do... They fight, they quarrel, they share sad moments together, they help each other up when they fall down, they will be side by side no matter what happens, they go through tough and sad problems together, encourage each other, when the other wears out, the other will help hold out, a shoulder and a listening ear would be given to each other.... and many other things....
Many Good and Bad Memories have passed us during our relationship times....
Bad ones are really heart-breaking moments....Almost to tears....Broke us up... And hurt both of us, not just you or me...
Then, the Good ones are really enjoyable, happy, funny, humorous, and never-want-to-forget-moments... and because there's still Good memories left... we are still together...
I can tell you this...Balancing the Good one over Bad memories is hard.... and keeping our hearts together as one is even harder... Our hearts are sometimes so fragile that I'm afraid it'll break to just touch them...
Sometimes... I'm afraid that all the Good memories will disappear inside your heart and forget about me... When you are angry, I just don't know how... But I felt yr anger pierce into me too.... And at that time you were so so fragile... And it's hard to talk to you when you are angry.... But I'll try hard to improve on it....
But anyways, like you said, the past is the past...
I'm going to write this post just for you and the about the piano which you played so grandly to me...
Today in the hall, though it's filled with all the kids voices, it felt as tough there's only the two of us, alone, your hands slid across the keys effortlessly, you bit your lips in concentration as you play the keys, I look on behind the keyboard....
I was speechless to see a guy who's mine and who was so amazing, smart, talented, and God blessed created all for me? There may be other people out there hungry for him, he's so precious to me, I don't want to lose him, I love him to much...
The sound of the notes soothing, you were playing my favorite song, I'm feeling calm and happy, you may not know, but now you know, sometimes, my heart cries to hear you playing more and longer... I wish I could ask you to play again and again... as long as time allows....
You are Beloved's Symphony, you can make it sound so much better, so so so much better.... making a simple song sound so grand. You really are blessed with God's gift...
I, Symphony Lockheart, your Symphony Listener, is really blessed to be with you, my love overflowing for you in my heart when you are with me... Trust me, I am BLESSED to have a GUY LIKE YOU.
I pray and hope the day that would separate us forever would not come....
Elaine, 16, Jonathan's girlfriend, a VERY blessed and happy girl. (:
You mean so so much to me, trust me,
Elaine
We are of the same age...studying in the same school...going to the same tuition...going out for school trips together...going out for a party treat together....and going to church together.... That's quite a lot of together isn't it??? XD
We, like most couples do... They fight, they quarrel, they share sad moments together, they help each other up when they fall down, they will be side by side no matter what happens, they go through tough and sad problems together, encourage each other, when the other wears out, the other will help hold out, a shoulder and a listening ear would be given to each other.... and many other things....
Many Good and Bad Memories have passed us during our relationship times....
Bad ones are really heart-breaking moments....Almost to tears....Broke us up... And hurt both of us, not just you or me...
Then, the Good ones are really enjoyable, happy, funny, humorous, and never-want-to-forget-moments... and because there's still Good memories left... we are still together...
I can tell you this...Balancing the Good one over Bad memories is hard.... and keeping our hearts together as one is even harder... Our hearts are sometimes so fragile that I'm afraid it'll break to just touch them...
Sometimes... I'm afraid that all the Good memories will disappear inside your heart and forget about me... When you are angry, I just don't know how... But I felt yr anger pierce into me too.... And at that time you were so so fragile... And it's hard to talk to you when you are angry.... But I'll try hard to improve on it....
But anyways, like you said, the past is the past...
I'm going to write this post just for you and the about the piano which you played so grandly to me...
Today in the hall, though it's filled with all the kids voices, it felt as tough there's only the two of us, alone, your hands slid across the keys effortlessly, you bit your lips in concentration as you play the keys, I look on behind the keyboard....
I was speechless to see a guy who's mine and who was so amazing, smart, talented, and God blessed created all for me? There may be other people out there hungry for him, he's so precious to me, I don't want to lose him, I love him to much...
The sound of the notes soothing, you were playing my favorite song, I'm feeling calm and happy, you may not know, but now you know, sometimes, my heart cries to hear you playing more and longer... I wish I could ask you to play again and again... as long as time allows....
You are Beloved's Symphony, you can make it sound so much better, so so so much better.... making a simple song sound so grand. You really are blessed with God's gift...
I, Symphony Lockheart, your Symphony Listener, is really blessed to be with you, my love overflowing for you in my heart when you are with me... Trust me, I am BLESSED to have a GUY LIKE YOU.
I pray and hope the day that would separate us forever would not come....
Elaine, 16, Jonathan's girlfriend, a VERY blessed and happy girl. (:
You mean so so much to me, trust me,
Elaine
Why us??
Just two days ago...Jonathan and I got into trouble...
Not a BIG trouble... but we got into trouble cause of that !$@$&!#@ brother of mine... he just can't mind his freaking business...
Jonathan got upset...I don't like it when he gets upset... when i try to talk to him or cheer him up, he ignores me... or walks away... and he keeps all quiet and emo whole day round...
We got separated from our seats again...yeap, we got separated THREE times alrdy.... but in the end we got back together again... The power of love..XD
But this time...I'm not sure whether we will be seated back together again...I really hope we do... I can't really concentrate on anything without him... I feel so empty behind me....like a BIG gap with wind blowing from behind...you get the feeling...
Even Alicia, my friend says my face looks so comical when Jonathan here, she say I looked like this when he comes through the door " :D" then when he turns to the classroom, she says my face go " : / " and then she say when I see her I'll be like " XD (waving a hi)"
Like I said before..I'm weird.. /:
I can't believe till now... there's a guy who would want me in his life... but yet he's in my life, I'm grateful and happy for it =) You can never feel how awesome I felt when I'm with him... and it's too complicated to explain so don't get your hopes up... XD
Just hope he won't forget to do his duty again... he forgot about it three times already... >__<'''
Partially...It's my fault.... XD
I love you =) if you know who you are...XD
Elaine :)
Saturday, June 04, 2011
It's a Sunday morning... :)
I didn't go to church today... Was tired after two straight days of waking up at 6.15 in the morning...so I slept in late...
Yesterday I learned more about god from somebody I know in my life :) he answered a lot of my questions when, as a Christian, I have no answers and faith to god... But everyone can learn to have faith in Him... So I'm learning right now...(:
He's a good example of a Godly christian... And he LOVES God a lot... And puts Him first in everything... Well, maybe... XD but overall, I love God too.. But maybe not as much as He did to me... :) tats what I learned...
And honestly... This is the first year I'm learning soo much about God.. And I'm going to church more now... All thanks to someone in my school who directed me back to God :)
Thank you,
Sincerely,
Elaine :)
Yesterday I learned more about god from somebody I know in my life :) he answered a lot of my questions when, as a Christian, I have no answers and faith to god... But everyone can learn to have faith in Him... So I'm learning right now...(:
He's a good example of a Godly christian... And he LOVES God a lot... And puts Him first in everything... Well, maybe... XD but overall, I love God too.. But maybe not as much as He did to me... :) tats what I learned...
And honestly... This is the first year I'm learning soo much about God.. And I'm going to church more now... All thanks to someone in my school who directed me back to God :)
Thank you,
Sincerely,
Elaine :)
Monday, May 30, 2011
Monday...
Somebody's day started out funnily bad...XD
My day started with a smile from my best friend... :)
The whole day continued with me having a flu... A bad one...
And the day ended with a stern look from my mum...
Sigh*
what a day...
A smile, without a doubt, will chase away a frown. :)
Elaine
My day started with a smile from my best friend... :)
The whole day continued with me having a flu... A bad one...
And the day ended with a stern look from my mum...
Sigh*
what a day...
A smile, without a doubt, will chase away a frown. :)
Elaine
Friday, May 20, 2011
Awesome Friday today...XD
I would think this activity is called jamming....anyways whatever we did together, WAS FUN!!! XD
I would think jamming is a mixture of drums and guitars and...tamburines??XD I was playing the tamburines...it was fun...-w- and gonna do it again the next time, if we hv time for it...we played different songs and the drum master was AWESOME!! even the fastest shutter from a camera can't match with his speed of playing the drums!! ><
How cool is THAT?!?!?XD
Anyways...the one word to describe today was...well, maybe two words... FUN!! AWESOME!! XD
I miss my friends....XD
Elaine :)
I would think jamming is a mixture of drums and guitars and...tamburines??XD I was playing the tamburines...it was fun...-w- and gonna do it again the next time, if we hv time for it...we played different songs and the drum master was AWESOME!! even the fastest shutter from a camera can't match with his speed of playing the drums!! ><
How cool is THAT?!?!?XD
Anyways...the one word to describe today was...well, maybe two words... FUN!! AWESOME!! XD
I miss my friends....XD
Elaine :)
Monday, May 16, 2011
Is it a threat or is it just plain stupid??
Guess what guys??
I'm being banned from playing piano with one of my close friends.
Isn't it stupid??
I mean, what kind of ban is THAT?!?! DX
Can't play piano?? HECK! It's not even funny... (not a joke)
I hate that a lot....it kinda took part of my soul away....
Though they say thank God for everything...but i won't thank Him for this..... )':
Feeling Kind of Lifeless Now...
Symphony Listener
(what's the use of having this name anymore when i can't play with him anymore?)
I'm being banned from playing piano with one of my close friends.
Isn't it stupid??
I mean, what kind of ban is THAT?!?! DX
Can't play piano?? HECK! It's not even funny... (not a joke)
I hate that a lot....it kinda took part of my soul away....
Though they say thank God for everything...but i won't thank Him for this..... )':
Feeling Kind of Lifeless Now...
Symphony Listener
(what's the use of having this name anymore when i can't play with him anymore?)
Tiring....
Lately I'm tiring out often...often soon after a shower i'll collapse on the bed...and frequently I'm getting headaches...which I rarely have...
Looking at words in prints made my eyes a blur....what's happening?!?!
Maybe I'm just too obssessed in my work or something....
Nowadays, what really hurts me now is my heart....a dull throb everytime I think about my home...
Honestly... I would rather stay in my school...
Looking at words in prints made my eyes a blur....what's happening?!?!
Maybe I'm just too obssessed in my work or something....
Nowadays, what really hurts me now is my heart....a dull throb everytime I think about my home...
Honestly... I would rather stay in my school...
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Hi Saturday^^....XD
Today, Saturday, I finally got to sleep in late...XD Why?? Usually on Saturdays my dad will bring us to eat morning dim sum....rarely I got a choice to either sleep or eat with them....Even I did this since I moved here...I'hv never liked to wake up to eat dimsum... the only things I like to eat there is eggtarts, fried fishball and porridge... My grandpa sometimes nag me when i take my choice of dimsum....XD I LOVE MY GRANDPARENTS!!!! :)
To simplify my day altogether...I woke up at 2.15 in the afternoon...I can sleep late when I want to...>< didn't eat breakfast so I ate lunch...char kuey teow...yum yum><...I didn't eat it for a long time alrdy....
I watched movies from PPS(a programme), Umi Monogatari, AWESOME I tell you....I love the opening song of it....
and then housechores....then work....tick tick tick tick* dinner time....chicken rice!! >< My mum was lazy to cook so....yea...and tmrw will be korean BBQ for dinner!!! XD I love Korean BBQ.
then after dinner, work again....
Till when I blog again...
Elaine :)
To simplify my day altogether...I woke up at 2.15 in the afternoon...I can sleep late when I want to...>< didn't eat breakfast so I ate lunch...char kuey teow...yum yum><...I didn't eat it for a long time alrdy....
I watched movies from PPS(a programme), Umi Monogatari, AWESOME I tell you....I love the opening song of it....
and then housechores....then work....tick tick tick tick* dinner time....chicken rice!! >< My mum was lazy to cook so....yea...and tmrw will be korean BBQ for dinner!!! XD I love Korean BBQ.
then after dinner, work again....
Till when I blog again...
Elaine :)
Friday, April 29, 2011
The price for you...I'm willing to pay for it...
So, today school was fun, we had a floorball match...and....we lost, i don't blame my team mates, I blame the other team members for being stronger than us... XD I listened to someone playing a song..well not a song but three songs, Dango(ori ver), First Love, and Wedding Dress by Tae Yang...awesome....I wish I can play piano now...but I don't have time to learn it..owh well...anyways, we didn't have to do work today...cuz it's sports day on every Friday. I had a shock when the principle calls me to his office, it's a thing which rarely happens to me cuz i'm not a bad girl...XD
Turns out that the principle had a look over my work chart and was planning to push me faster through my work...well...that's okay, i can handle the work load....but it seems like someone doesn't prefer me to stick my head in books throughout the day....we made a deal though I don't really like the conditions...but, what choice do I have?? None. It's for my own good and his...
After we agreed, one word that's sticked to my mind now is work. I told him once that I was expensive and he was willing to pay me with everything he has...now this is the price I have to pay to be with him. I have to finish level 8 fast and get to level 9, it may sound like a computer game to you but let me assure you, it's a damn hard level to pass....or should I say, this doesn't sound like a game at all...it's the reality.
It's so easy to achieve yet so difficult to do it.....If I don't want to lose him, I got to do it....
If God were to grant me one power, i would ask for the ability to write fast....
I prayed, all I could do now is to have hope, faith and trust in me and him. I can do this.
Wish me luck friends^^
Truthfully,
Elaine...
Turns out that the principle had a look over my work chart and was planning to push me faster through my work...well...that's okay, i can handle the work load....but it seems like someone doesn't prefer me to stick my head in books throughout the day....we made a deal though I don't really like the conditions...but, what choice do I have?? None. It's for my own good and his...
After we agreed, one word that's sticked to my mind now is work. I told him once that I was expensive and he was willing to pay me with everything he has...now this is the price I have to pay to be with him. I have to finish level 8 fast and get to level 9, it may sound like a computer game to you but let me assure you, it's a damn hard level to pass....or should I say, this doesn't sound like a game at all...it's the reality.
It's so easy to achieve yet so difficult to do it.....If I don't want to lose him, I got to do it....
If God were to grant me one power, i would ask for the ability to write fast....
I prayed, all I could do now is to have hope, faith and trust in me and him. I can do this.
Wish me luck friends^^
Truthfully,
Elaine...
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Wednesday...issit April Fool's Day today???
According to what the title said...issit April Fool's Day today?? No...but why the heck did some people just throw a FAKE cockroach in front of ME?!?!?! DX If you are doing your work and some random people just throw that THING in front of you, what will you do if you are scared of insects?!?! YOU'LL SCREAM OF COURSE!!! DX that is just the most embarassing thing i did ever in my life!! they just gave me a phobia of cockroaches now....= =....
I hate it when people do things like that, it makes you wanna slap them if they say it's a joke and you are suppose to laugh....= =...how can you make the person laugh if they are scared of cockroaches in the first place??(not expecting an answer...)
well...at least someone helped to brighten it up...and made me laugh and stay cheerful throughout the day than to stay emo till school ends.....
Thank You.. =') you made my day, well..most of it...XD
Elaine
Monday, April 11, 2011
It's Monday XD
First day of the week, nothing really happened... owh well, but everyday is exciting you know, you never know what's gonna happen and when someone will tickle you hard....XD currently a lot of ppl have been doing that to me these days....XD
I miss my friends and my close friend even when I don't see them for two days....XD but i'm not an emotional person...wait, since when did the topic change to myself??.....DX XD
Draw draw draw, work work, work....that's what I do, it may sound boring to you, but to me it's like a consistent time table...some ppl say i'm a nerd and having no life....XD so what?? I'll take your comments as a tease ...><
Book Lover....Sort of...XD
Elaine :D
I miss my friends and my close friend even when I don't see them for two days....XD but i'm not an emotional person...wait, since when did the topic change to myself??.....DX XD
Draw draw draw, work work, work....that's what I do, it may sound boring to you, but to me it's like a consistent time table...some ppl say i'm a nerd and having no life....XD so what?? I'll take your comments as a tease ...><
Book Lover....Sort of...XD
Elaine :D
Saturday, April 09, 2011
It's wayyyy past midnight and I'm blogging!!!XD not a thing to do for kids and girls...
I know some people might think I'm crazy blogging at midnight...XD well, I am crazy XD okay, this is my first time posting my first post, and I don't know what in the world should I talk about...oh, I know, today I learned how to upload songs into my blog!! How cool is that?!?! XD this may sound pretty lame to you guys but...yea, I'm weird...XD btw, I'm a christian and an open person here, no matter who you are you will still be my friend...^^ wait a minute...why am I talking a different topic?!?! DX
Okay...im a busy girl at this moment till June and I may not be posting as often as a blogger should...XD and I'm not even supposed to have a blog!! XD (dun ask..it's a long story...XD)
Fish...I'm talking another topic now...okay, let's just stick to one last one, I owe a lot to the person whom is the most important and special in my life a lot of things...he made my life a lot brighter for me to live in, he is the one who changed my perspective of life, how cool is that?!?! XD anyways...I should stop now or I'll start bragging on and on and on about him...and also get grounded for sleeping late...XD
Good MorNight,
Elaine :D
Okay...im a busy girl at this moment till June and I may not be posting as often as a blogger should...XD and I'm not even supposed to have a blog!! XD (dun ask..it's a long story...XD)
Fish...I'm talking another topic now...okay, let's just stick to one last one, I owe a lot to the person whom is the most important and special in my life a lot of things...he made my life a lot brighter for me to live in, he is the one who changed my perspective of life, how cool is that?!?! XD anyways...I should stop now or I'll start bragging on and on and on about him...and also get grounded for sleeping late...XD
Good MorNight,
Elaine :D
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)